THE UNEXPECTED VALUE OF DISCOMFORT
Date Published: August 5, 2015
Once in a Blue Moon…
I took my boys out to a Full moon party tonight. They were NOT happy.
Usually I only take them to events that are geared for them. The grace of having help at home. Also, the result of having time to myself and honoring them when it’s time to be together.
It was complete resistance heading out. I decided to show them I was determined to go. As a family, we are a team and they have to learn how to be a part of one. Peacefully it took me 25min to leave home. Ay ay ayyy!
Once they got there, they realized it was not the full moon party they were used to with glow in the dark lights, roasted marshmellows, children, DJ and telescope to see the moon. Playing tag was vetoed and swimming which I promised was not allowed. I carried my oldest son on my back and danced with him for a bit… Until he started pinching me and asking through clenched teeth to leave right away. I did my best.
If I always make it comfortable for them, how will they learn to cope and manage their emotions? At the same time i didn’t want to further distrub the space. It was a test to my peace and I passed to some degree. I would have stayed longer and yet I left exactly at the right time.
As I soak up the Moon beams with the boys asleep, I remember how EXPECTATIONS so often disappoint us and don’t allow us to enjoy what IS.
Resistance and wanting things OUR way are simply barriers we put on our experience. So there is much value in discomfort. It gives us the opportunity to learn how to cope and let go of resistance.
Patience. Love. Respect. Forgiveness. Awareness. Gratitude. Another good talk with them at bedtime. I find that at the end of they day, they want to stay awake and cuddle so it’s the perfect moment to share with them. Many nights I am tired and ready to have my own time. Yet, it’s a magical time together and worth the extra patience.
Sweet dreams and a big hug to all parents!!!
Foto Credit: Erik Guru Lieux