WHAT NOT TO DO WHEN YOU TRIGGER SOMEONE
Date: September 24, 2013
All days are not created equal. What remains the same is that underneath the drama of life, we are evolving in awareness and love. I’m ready to learn and change. More than I imagined!!!
You know when you are acting from your best intentions and it doesn’t play out well with someone?! I’ve been there. The heart aches and the mind starts rambling through all the reasons why they aren’t getting me. If they just understood me!!!!
(If you get upset at any point jump to number 4)
1) Who’s Naive?
Joy should never be confused with being naive. Being real and fresh comes from a deep understanding of pain, frustration, disappointment, failure, fear, sorrow and despair. It requires letting go so that what IS can show up without pulling up the past. I have had many intense moments in this lifetime (like most of us!) which have given me a clear appreciation of life, an overflowing heart and an immense capacity for compassion.
Being Joyful is a sacred connection to the Universe. Seriousness does not equate respect. Respect is the honoring from the heart and the true understanding of the energy of love and oneness with all.
2) Who’s Unconscious?
I dedicate my life to growing in consciousness and awakening; to be aligned with the light. That means I am very aware of the ramblings of my mind and my mistakes. What I have learned to do is to forgive myself. I don’t give myself a hard time anymore if I goof up. I sincerely apologize, learn from the situation and move on. I can see how showing no guilt could be confused with unconsciousness.
3) Who’s your momma?
I’m a momma of two boys. I’m used to pouring my heart out to them and giving them insights into my own understandings. I also constantly learn from them and accept their observations of what to change.
You’re right! I’m NOT your momma. Giving people advice or my perspective, even when given permission, can back fire. It can also create beautiful bonds. At best I can share my own experiences. Sometimes I channel information and I have to learn to keep it to myself and only speak if directly asked for it.
4) Who doesn’t care?
Ok. Just STOP!!!!!
When a person is triggered, hurt and upset the last thing they want to hear is a defense and justifications. They’ve experienced a series of things that have them in tourmoil and the best way to interact is to see their point of view. Just sit there with them and observe it. “Oh. Yeah. That stinks. I’m sorry. I can see it clearly and that won’t happen again!”. It’s as simple as dropping it and being present to their experience.
There is no need to prove: I am this or that. I am in my right space or perspective. It was from the heart. That is beyond the situation. Whether it’s someone we know well or a stranger on the street, they just need an honest acknowledgment of our understanding.
I see it. I feel it. I’m sorry. I love you.
Love. Light. Understanding.